Again?

Want to hear a secret?

I want to be pregnant again.

Crazy, right? I have days where I want to drop my child off on someone's doorstep (kidding! kind of...), and yet I want to add another baby into the mix? Well...yes and no. I'm not exactly ready for the whole raising another kid part of it (though I've heard that's part of the deal), and I'm certainly not enthused about another labor and delivery, but I would do the pregnancy part of it again in a minute.

At only two months postpartum, I think I'm supposed to be thankful I made it through the journey, and wholly focused on my new baby. And I am, but a part of me can't help but feel jealous when I see pregnant women. I remember how much I loved that stage of my life, and I want to do it all over again (and again, and again). I'm a planner at heart, and pregnancy fed into all my desires to dream, and prep, and nest....I loved watching my body change, documenting the milestones, and just marveling at the craziness that is creating life. From scratch. I don't think I'm sugar coating it too much when I say that for me, it was a magical nine months. I know it's easy to look at the past with rose colored glasses, but in all honestly, my experience was pretty rosey. I may not have loved every single second, but I came about as close to it as you can.

And it goes beyond just loving being pregnant. Now that we've actually gotten to experience what it's like to meet the little bundle we prepared so long for, it's easy to get addicted to that feeling. There are moments when I look at Piper and I'm awestruck that we actually created this little being. Every bit of her looks and personality is a surprise, and I find myself wondering what another little Bowden baby would be like. Would it be another girl? Would she be a chunky little thing? Would a boy have as much hair as his sister? Would the next one resemble me, or be another mini-Dustin? And I imagine as we get to know our daughter more, and see glimpses into her developing personality, the questions will only increase. I love getting to know this little person we've been blessed with, and every detail we learn reminds me there are million nuances that we've yet to see. It's so fun to watch a life unfold, and I getting the urge to do it over and over again.

And besides...
...maternity jeans are soooooo much more comfy than regular clothes.